Questions, Answers and Suggestions

Gam-Anon is emotionally supportive of the Gamblers Anonymous program. We understand the process of recovery and what the loved ones of GA members can expect. We have learned from our own experiences that we have often enabled the gambler's gambling and irresponsible behaviors out of our love for our gamblers and fear of the consequences of the gambling. We have learned that if we are supportive of the gambler's efforts in recovery and do not enable the gambler out of love or fear, it helps the gambler in his or her recovery.

Can I attend Gam-Anon if my gambler is still gambling?

Yes, of course. Many of our members have loved ones who are still gambling. Gam-Anon meetings help us realize that we are not alone with our problems. The Steps and tools of the program help us to take control of our lives in spite of the gambling and problems caused by the gambling. We use the Gam-Anon program to build our own inner core of strength and emotional maturity. When we understand the illness of compulsive gambling, and follow the Gam-Anon Steps and suggestions, the resulting change in our actions and attitudes may help the gambler realize that compulsive gambing is a problem and motivate an interest in bringing about a change.

What if there is no Gam-Anon meeting near to me?

Contact the Gam-Anon International Service Office at gamanonoffice@gam-anon.org for information and assistance.

1. Accept and learn to live with the fact that compulsive gambling is an illness that cannot be cured, but with recovery in GA, the gambler can have meaningful abstinence.

2. The gambler, not you, should be responsible for calling the gambler's creditors to make restitution. Don't enable the gambler by taking this responsibility away from him or her.

3. Experience has taught us that it is not helpful to the gambler to borrow monies or co-sign notes to cover gambling debts while the gambler is gambling or even when the gambler joins Gamblers Anonymous. Gamblers Anonymous offers a specific approach to managing finances and debt through its Pressure Relief Meeting.

4. It is not recommended that anyone pay any gambling debts or the gambler's living expenses. This is the responsibility of the gambler.

5. Prudence tells us that compulsive gamblers are seldom able to handle family finances. Perhaps this condition will be altered as the gambler progresses in recovery. The Gam-Anon Budget Relief program helps us understand and organize family finances.

6. Discourage friends and family from lending the gambler money.

7. The gambler's gambling debts were not incurred over a short period of time, therefore don't be discouraged if the gambler finds it necessary to pay back small amounts of monies over an extended period. Normal family expenses must come first. The Gamblers Anonymous Presssure Relief Meeting will help the gambler establish financial priorities and schedule debt repayments.

8. Recovery is a slow process for the gambler. Give the gambler your encouragement and have faith in the GA and Gam-Anon programs.

9. Come to Gam-Anon even though your gambler may continue to gambler. We understand your problem and can help you cope with the issues that surface due to the gambling and accompanying behaviors.

10. To question or interrogate the gambler will serve no purpose. You are powerless to stop the gambler. If the gambler has something the gambler wishes to hide, the truth cannot be forced from the gambler. It only causes us emotional distress to try.